Sunday, May 21, 2006

It's Too Damned Early!

6:40 a.m. - I woke up over an hour ago with a million story lines rolling through my head. I wasn’t ready to wake up yet; in fact my alarm is set for 8:00. It’s Sunday morning, dammit! Oh well, time to put some coffee on and write something… we’ll see what it is just as soon as I get my caffeine.

It’s brewing… Ohhh ya! That’s good coffee!

I never really considered myself a prolific writer. Hell, until recently I never really considered myself a writer period - and on some level still don’t. Writing has always been a chore for me. I never wanted to write anything, being good at it has nothing to do with it. In some respects I still don’t, I mean let’s face it; I really wanted to be sleeping right now. But no, I have this drive, this motivation to write and I don’t even know what.

That’s a lie, I know what. I know of several “whats.” I awoke to thinking about the first chapter in my as yet unwritten book. It went on to other ideas, the “prolificness” (not a word, spell-checker is having fits) of my writing being the one I seized upon this morning. It then wandered off to things like the nature of the universe. Yup, I think about those things! So… am I a prolific writer?

No. Not yet anyway. Most of what I have is still abstract thought. There are times such as this morning where these thoughts are crystallizing, precipitating out in the form of the written word, but more often than not I’ll resist. I don’t want to like this, but I’m only fooling myself. Old habits, however, die hard – I’m not supposed to like “the arts.”

From grade school all the way through high school, math was my forte. I excelled in other “hard” sciences too. It seemed natural enough; I grew up in the Silicon Valley during the technology boom – everyone was some kind of engineer, except the kind that drove trains. My father has a PhD in chemistry – from Stanford no less. The cast was set. Combined with the fact that I had always struggled – a little bit – in English, it appeared that I was destined to follow the same path.

I never really considered any other alternative. I would, for a very long time, assume that this was the course expected of me; that I really had no encouragement or option to explore other avenues. It was a creation of my imagination. I had simply put one and one together and came up with three, math genius that I am. There were numerous other factors that I failed to consider because I had already figured it out. I knew it all. It is therefore stuck in my now much more enlightened mind that I am no good at this. English and writing are my “off” subjects. I’m not supposed to like it.

In most every respect, I have grown very fond of writing. The resistance is more background noise than anything else. It can be, however, very inconvenient. I did not want to be inspired at five o’clock this morning. I would have preferred it come at about noon – or maybe tomorrow. In reality, all I’m doing right now is stalling; I have not satisfied the curiosity that had awakened me. It was about the book – a project that I know all too well could have me planted here all freakin’ day. Today, this will have to do.

10 comments:

BarbaraFromCalifornia said...

That is the best time of the day, the early morning, for me, at least, to begin to write.

That being said, I usually fall asleep at around 9:30.

You are a wonderful writer, and I wish you all the very best.

Thank you for all your positive, supportive comments on my blog!

Mr. Althouse said...

How did you happen upon this blog? I know it's on my profile page, but I haven't said anythiong to anyone about it. You must have a curiosity streak in you.

Thank you for your kind words. I created this for, as the name would imply, overflow. I wrote this and didn't want to bury my "links review" with it, yet I didn't want it to sit on my hard drive never to see the light of day again.

Sooner or later I'll polish this page up and announce it as an alternative for any who may want to read more of my musings. You have the honor of being my very first visitor. I am glad it was you, my friend!

~Mike

Lacey said...

Hello Mike,

Your profile page is the one bookmarked for me, not your main blog page. I saw this and got curious.

I have a friend who aspires to be a published author, and another who is one. It's a tough road. But you are fairly prolific :) I'm curious about the book you want to write. Ficiton? Non-fiction? I would *love* to see a creative-writing peice by you. Want to swap?

jinsane said...

I have many "drafts" saved, and I'm very inclined to agree with you. I am afraid that they will just sit there and die. I'm alot like you, in that I wake up at all hours with a million thoughts flowing through my head and the little pad I keep by my bed does me no good!!

I think this will be a good outlet for you. Leave nothing unwritten or unsaid - what a way to really let go of everything!! "Overflow" is just perfect!!

Bar Bar A said...

I think most writers have this issues...I know I do. I have been known to pull over on the side of the rode to write down a thought cause my memory is really bad (years of partying maybe?).

I'll be back to read more! You ARE a prolific writer!

Ellen said...

Oh please continue writing anything and everything you can think of.... I enjoy it all.... and am thrilled for this second blog of yours.

Biker Betty said...

Don't worry about a purpose for this blog. Whoever said you have to have a reason to write about something specific? If one eventually comes out, fine. Just have fun and I look forward to future journeys with your posts.

Snaggle Tooth said...

What I hate is when I don't take down notes n lose some great word formations due to short-term memory loss...
Also I can't stand never finding the time to get back to all the projects I want to do-

ps. I hope you're not paranoid of judgements against your blogging!

Awareness said...

Hi there.

Morning writing is the best. Afterall, you've just percolated and processed many ideas in your dreams and sleep. That's how look at it. And in the morning, the ideas are still fresh.

The other little brainwave I've had while trying to figure out when and how my novel will get flowing and written is that any writing one does is all fodder for future novel. I can't tell you how many times since I started blogging as a way to structure my writing time during the day AND get my "writing" brain kicked into gear again, that I have seen thematic threads in my writing, or that I've been able to incorporate a "posting" into a workshop that I'm giving etc. It happens all the time.......I find out after I've written something, that it can be utilized again in some other fashion.

All writing is good........it can always be edited at a later date. The most important thing, I believe is to keep the juices flowing and allow serendipity to lead at times.

What did Crash Davis tell Moose in Bull Durham when he couldn't get the ball over the plate? He told him not to think to much :o) Sometimes with writing, one just has to allow it to flow naturally and let it lead you.
I'm thoroughly enjoying your postings, Mike..... to use another baseball analogy....this one from the Field of Dreams... If you build it, they will come." You have built a space for your writing. It will come. And, who knows? It may arrive first thing in the morning!!

Cheers.
Muskie.

Mr. Althouse said...

To all that have graced this blog with their visits and comments: Thank You. I can't begin to properly express how much all your feedback means to me.

~Mike